Had a great chat with a family member recently. I opened up about my hoarding and explained the process I am in with purging my home of the clutter and purging my head of wrong thinking about my stuff.
She asked what kind of stuff I hang onto. I answered her right away because I had already identified the two categories. "Sentimental" things... things that have sentimental value to me and therefore I assign emotional value to it and have trouble letting it go. And "Just in Case" things. Things that I believe I may need, or someone else may need one day.
The Just in Case is what is out of control more than anything else.
Confession time:
At last count, I have 72 socks that have lost their match. I keep them (for years? gulp.) in the hopes that their true match will one day find it's way back into our lives.
I have 1 1/2 bins of wrapping paper, bows, ribbons and gift bags. Just in case I should ever need them. The funny thing is that some of the gift bags, etc. that are in there I have had in my possession since the first year I was married.
I have over 20 purses. Just in case I should need that small silver glittery one the next time I go on a cruise, the small black one that matches a perfect black dress that doesn't fit me any more, and a brown leopard one with patent handle that will go perfect with brown patent peep toes that I have looked for at stores for over 2 years now. ...
I have the hard drive to a computer that died 3 years ago. The drive pretty much melted and the data on it couldn't be retrieved. I kept it though. My daughters baby pictures are on it. Things I had been working on were on that drive. Maybe one day technology will find a way to bring it back to life? Or I will have the $1000 it would take to send it to a computer hard drive hospital and have it re built.
Just in Case.
I have a suit case with the zipper broken on it.
I have clothes that are 2 sizes too small for me.
I have bins and boxes of hobbies I haven't picked up in years. Scrapbooking, piano books, etc.
I have 11 earrings that don't have their match.
I have 2 totes full of craft items from the 1990's.
I have boxes of magazines that have recipes and household tips that I thought I may need... one day. But thinking about it now, they are from the 1990's or earlier. Chances are they won't even apply to my life or my style by the time I finally go through them.
...
It's a "Just In Case" epidemic at my home.
But, "you never know", I think. "Someone might need this stuff one day."
I talk myself into keeping it. If I happen to be smart and throw it out, I keep thinking about that item in the trash. It keeps bugging me and doesn't stop until its gone with the garbage truck.
It is hard to let these things go. I can't explain why. I can't describe the feeling. I feel foolish just talking about it. There is fear behind it, this I know. There is a control that I don't want to give up. And more than that, there is the desire to meet a need. A need of my own, and also the needs of my family and friends. I just love coming the rescue with an item for someone. "Where in the world did you get that?" they ask.
"oh, I happened to hang onto it... Just in Case."
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